HELP! HOW DO I STOP BEING SO AWKWARD IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA?
Nearly everyone on earth, at some point or another, has felt awkward in front of a camera. Even as cameras have become entirely mainstream, we still take a gazillion shots to get that one that makes us appear effortless. If that’s the case, how do wedding photographers do it? How does a wedding photographer prevent you from looking awkward in photos?
It isn’t magic, it’s experience.
It isn’t hope, it’s skill.
It isn’t luck, it’s a relationship.
THE DEEPEST, TRUEST ROOT OF AWKWARDNESS IN FRONT OF THE CAMERA…
Truth bomb: it isn’t your lack of self-esteem, it isn’t your anxiety, it isn’t the myriad worries you have about how you look. The MOST critical cause of awkwardness in front of the camera is your relationship with your wedding photographer. This relationship can make or break your wedding photography experience, and in turn, the photos you receive.
HOW DO I KNOW WHICH WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER IS FOR ME?
Start here: trust your gut. If you’re scrolling through a wedding photographer’s website and feel like this person is speaking your love language, then there’s a strong chance you will genuinely like them as a person. Get on that consultation call to gain clarity. The wedding photographer who suits you best will instantly put you at ease, feel like a friend, and be able to answer your questions and concerns with understanding, kindness and comfort. You will genuinely like them! This is key! This interaction is crucial to predicting how you will feel once you’re in front of the camera on your wedding day - one of the most important days of your life during some deeply vulnerable moments. You want someone on the other side of the camera who feels like your most supportive, loving friend, someone who erases your self-consciousness, first with their presence, and second with their skills.
HOW CAN I BE SURE A WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER HAS THE SKILLS IT TAKES TO PREVENT AWKWARDNESS IN PHOTOS?
Lucky for us, hiring a wedding photographer requires human connection. By paying attention to their messaging on their website and speaking with them, we can get a sense of their skills. Are they the type of photographer who leaves images up to chance, or do they have the experience and interpersonal skills to elicit genuine comfort from their clients? Ask them a simple question:
How do you work with people on a wedding day?
If they sound very hands-off and attribute most of their work to candids or wave off that everyone feels awkward in front of the camera or say they prefer to be invisible and capture a wedding like a fly on the wall, these are red flags. It is a signal that perhaps they lack the experience or even passion to go the extra mile to build the relationship crucial to making wedding clients feel at ease. No matter how much you love their photos, if you don’t click or feel comfortable in their presence, your insecurities may be triggered on your wedding day.
Instead, you want to listen for reassurances like:
I love working with people! Their comfort is the most important factor for achieving gorgeous photos.
I prioritize lots of open communication so my clients feel like they already know me when we meet on their
wedding day.I encourage my clients to be open and share all of their concerns. It is important for me to understand where they need support so that I can provide communication and resources that will ease their stress.
My photos are created both from the relationship I have with my clients and my knowledge about the art and technicalities of photography. My wealth of experience has given me the insight that a client should not know what to do in front of the camera. It is my job to empower and guide my client through their experience and exactly what they should do in front of the camera. I will provide clear posing guidance that will shift the focus away from the camera and onto their relationship and love. As their comfort grows, so will their confidence in front of the camera. This is one of my greatest skills as a wedding photographer!
WHAT IF IT’S REALLY ME? I’M WORRIED I’M GOING TO BE SERIOUSLY AWKWARD…
That’s totally understandable. You’re only human!! In today’s world, with the onslaught of social media and comparison-culture, it can be really hard to be sure of yourself. But know this - a wedding photographer who genuinely loves their clients will be genuinely interested in you and your version of love and wedded bliss. The right wedding photographer will provide you with tips and posing guidance to maximize your beauty, have the skills to flatter you in every image, will soothe your worries with empowerment, and encourage you to really embrace your dreams. It should be a beautiful, positive interaction that quells your fears and allows you to be fully yourself. To prepare yourself for this interaction and for your wedding, consider doing some much needed self-care:
Take social media breaks. Our brains need a break from the digital overload of images telling us maybe we aren’t enough. Use an app to track your scrolling time and block out time to plan and dream up the wedding that really aligns with who you are. Write it all down in a notebook as a reminder that your own unique vision matters most of all.
Schedule in some exercise. 30 minutes in your living room, a brisk walk, a bike ride, a run, some time at the gym, getting together with friends for some group motiviation. Any amount of exercise naturally produces the chemicals for positive emotional feelings. With that positivity, comes self-confidence. Weight, body shape - none of that truly matters. Moving your body matters, reaffirming that you are strong in your own skin. How you feel inside reflects powerfully in photos.
Create some affirmations and/or a gratitude practice. It might just be writing down the few most important ways you want to feel on your wedding day and sticking it to your computer monitor, or setting it as your phone screen. It’s easy to lose sight of the big picture in the mess of wedding planning details. Staying focused on what really matters can help shed feelings of obligation and unnecessary expectations, and keep you grounded in gratitude and your own values.
Get outside and let nature heal you. There’s this practice called forest bathing, originally coined and studied by the Japanese. Research has proven that spending time immersed in nature, sans distractions, lowers blood pressure and cortisol, eases anxiety and depression and improves sleep and immunity. The key is to be free of any media distractions, to move slowly and intentionally, and to allow the sounds, smells and sensations of the natural world take over your senses. As little as 20 minutes can make a difference!
Schedule an engagement session as a trial. Most wedding photographers offer engagement or couples sessions to give their clients the opportunity to get in front of the camera before their big day. This is an excellent way to work out all of your nerves and self-consciousness and to receive proof that you are indeed gorgeous in front of the camera!
If you are interested to know more about how I work with my wedding clients. Feel free to explore more here: